In the 10 years since summiting Mt. Kilimanjaro, I devoted myself to studying the transformation that I underwent so that I could boil it down to a simple (and repeatable) framework for building confidence that I could share with others.
So, how do we build REAL confidence and become unstoppable?
Self-respect forms the foundation for how we treat ourselves and dictates the boundaries we set with others, impacting our overall well-being. If we don’t show respect to ourselves, how can we expect it from others?
Self-acceptance allows us to embrace the totality of who we are, including our strengths and accomplishments and our weaknesses and shortcomings, leading us to understand that failures are simply stepping stones to success.
Self-worth is the internal sense of your own value as a person, regardless of external validations or accomplishments. When we have strong self-worth, we feel more confident, make healthier choices, and build more positive relationships.
Self-love is the foundation for living without limits. It’s recognizing your worth isn’t defined by achievements or external approval but by who you are at your core. When you embrace yourself, you gain the confidence to take risks, pursue your dreams, and create a life of freedom.
You can’t build confidence, lead others, or trust yourself if your inner voice is constantly cutting you down.
If you catch yourself starting sentences with “I’m sorry, but…” when you’ve done nothing wrong, or you find yourself avoiding your own reflection in the mirror, it’s time for a mindset shift.
Respect yourself and change the narrative. Remember that you are enough, and reclaim a piece of your confidence. When you start treating yourself with the same compassion you give everyone else, everything begins to shift.
Failure is not the opposite of success. It creates our defining moments and teaches us valuable lessons.
When we refuse to fail, we refuse to grow. We hold ourselves back, make ourselves small, and never try in the first place.
Confidence doesn’t come from never falling down. It comes from realizing you can fall, get back up, and keep going.
So don’t hide your failures. Embrace them to build confidence.
What do you want?
Not what your boss wants, what your family expects, or what you think you should want.
Your confidence depends on clarity. If you don’t know where you’re going, you can’t trust yourself to get there, and you’ll let others decide what’s best for you.
Reflect on what you really want, and everything else will begin to realign. You’ll be more intentional with your time and energy, and you’ll start saying yes to the things that give you purpose.
When was the last time you did something that scared you, even just a little?
In order to build confidence, you have to step into the unknown. Take opportunities that feel uncomfortable. Redefine your relationship with fear, and don’t let it control you.
The moment you begin to live without limits, you begin to stretch what’s possible.
Discover your signature mix of courage, energy, and flavor.
Whether you’re navigating a new chapter like motherhood or a career pivot, or just wondering when it will be your turn, this book is a reminder that you don’t need to become someone new. You simply need to remember who you are.
REAL Confidence is an honest, in-depth look at what it really takes to develop confidence from the inside out. It provides practical tools, personal stories, and mindset shifts that help you go from unsure to unshakeable.
After all, confidence isn’t something you’re born with—it’s something you build.
Let’s get started.