Emma’s Brave Choice
Last fall, my oldest daughter Emma made a bold decision: she stepped out of her comfort zone, packed up her life and moved to Cardiff, Wales to pursue her master’s degree in art conservation.

Now, this wasn’t just a new school in a new city. It was a new country. A new culture. An ocean away from everything familiar.

And even though Emma is independent and grounded, this was still a huge leap. New language rhythms, new systems, new expectations—and no close friends or family nearby. She was stepping into the unknown, and she was doing it entirely on her own.

A Summer in Athens
This summer, she took another brave step: volunteering in Athens, Greece, working with a conservation team that is working musical instruments, old wine and liquor bottles, and paper. When she sent me photos from the lab—carefully holding pieces of history—it hit me just how far outside her comfort zone she’s gone.

Not just physically, but emotionally.

Because these choices take courage.

Feeling the Fear—And Moving Anyway
Most people would hesitate before making a move like this. They’d worry about the distance, the unknowns, the “what ifs.” And to be honest, Emma had those feelings too. She was nervous; she questioned herself, but she didn’t let those thoughts drive the decision.

She felt the fear, she heard the doubt.
And she moved forward anyway.

That’s the part of her story that sticks with me—not just as her mom, but as someone who’s walked through plenty of her own moments of uncertainty.

The Myth of Fearlessness
We often think brave people are fearless; that confidence means never hesitating or second-guessing, but that’s not how it works.

Fear shows up every time we step toward something new. It whispers, “Stay where it’s safe.”
And we have to decide: is comfort the goal, or is growth?

Emma chose growth.

And in doing so, she built something that can’t be taught in a classroom or downloaded from a podcast.

The Confidence You Earn
She built confidence.

Not the loud, look-at-me kind, the quiet kind, the kind that comes from navigating a new city, learning how to ask for help in another language, figuring out how to stay steady when everything around you is unfamiliar.

I’ve seen that same kind of confidence build in my own life, not from ease—but from action.

Climbing Kilimanjaro.
Standing on a TEDx stage.
Writing a book.
Starting a business.
Raising six kids—three adopted from different countries—while still figuring out who I was.

None of those moments felt comfortable at the start. Most of them didn’t feel comfortable halfway through either, but what they all had in common was this: I said yes before I felt fully ready.

That’s where the growth lives—that’s where confidence begins to take root.

Why I Created the REAL Method
It’s one of the reasons I created the REAL Method. Because real confidence doesn’t show up because you have all the answers. It shows up because you start moving anyway.

Respect yourself.
Embrace your failures.
Ask yourself what you want.
Live without limits.

That last part gets misunderstood sometimes.
“Live without limits” doesn’t mean you ignore your reality.
It doesn’t mean you force your way through burnout or pretend you’re fearless.

It means you stop letting fear make your choices for you, it means you stop letting other people’s expectations set the boundaries of your life.

What Stepping Out Can Look Like
It’s not just about doing something dramatic like moving across the world. Getting out of your comfort zone can look like:

• Saying no to something you’ve always said yes to
• Speaking up in a room where you’ve usually stayed quiet
• Signing up for the class
• Finally making the doctor’s appointment
• Starting the business
• Having the conversation you’ve been avoiding
• Admitting you’re ready for something more

Growth doesn’t have a size limit.
What’s brave for you might look different than what was brave for Emma, that doesn’t make it less meaningful.

Comfort Feels Safe—But Confidence Lives Elsewhere
And let’s not pretend it’s easy. The comfort zone is appealing for a reason. It’s predictable. It’s manageable. It keeps us from the sting of rejection or failure or looking foolish.

But it also keeps us from discovering what we’re capable of.

From finding new parts of ourselves, from making an impact, from building the kind of confidence that sticks with you—not just when things are going well, but when they’re hard.

Emma inspires me because she’s living all of that right now.
She’s stretching herself in ways that will change her life forever—not because everything is perfect, but because she’s willing to show up anyway.

You Don’t Have to Wait to Feel Ready
And the truth is—we all have the ability to do the same.
We don’t have to wait for permission or perfect timing; we don’t even have to wait until we feel confident.

Confidence isn’t a prerequisite.
It’s a result.

So maybe you’re standing at the edge of something right now; maybe there’s a move you’re considering—literal or emotional.
Maybe you’ve been feeling that inner pull toward something new, something a little scary, something uncertain.

Take the Next Brave Step
What would it look like to just take one step?

Not the whole leap. Just the next small, honest, imperfect step.

I’ll tell you what I’ve learned from watching Emma—and from living it myself:

That one step?
That’s where confidence starts.