Everybody has stress.

But not everyone knows how to manage it.

Still, there are steps that we can take so that stress doesn’t overwhelm us.

Stress Often Comes from Life’s Circumstances

It’s back to school time right now, and as parents, we are stressed about getting everything ready.

We’ve taken a break all summer long.

But now the kids need lunches, they need school supplies, they need shoes and clothes, and they need all the right books.

We are doing all we can to make everything just right for that first day of school.

And it takes a lot of work and a whole lot of time to make that happen.

Because of life’s busyness, sometimes, it’s tough this time of year to really take a breath and slow down for a minute.

But it’s because we’re in this time of year that we really need to give ourselves a moment to breathe.

We can do this by evaluating what it is we are actually stressing about.

There Are Just Some Things We Can’t Control

One of the things I tell myself (and my children) is that I only allow myself to stress about the things that I can control.

That may sound strange, but there are just some things in life that we simply cannot control.

It’s pointless to stress about the traffic, the choices of someone else, or the weather. These things, along with many other things, are outside of our control.

No matter how hard we try, we cannot force the clouds to stop sending down rain.

But what we can do is carry an umbrella—that is within our control.

Similarly, we hear so many people around us moaning and groaning and fighting about everything to do with politics right now.

We can’t control what is happening, but we can control our vote.

We can stress all we want about what other people are going to do with their vote, but that is outside of our control.

So, we have to do our best to do the things we can, then let go of the things we have no control over.

If we want to change things, our actions are really the only things we have control over.

Create a To-Do List

One of the things I do to help me take action on the things I can control is I create a To-Do list.

If I can control something, that means I can finish it. And when I finish it, the stress is over.

When it comes to my To-Do list, I make sure that I am checking things off the list throughout the day.

Checking things off is important because when I check the last thing off my list each day, I no longer feel stressed.

I also feel like I’ve accomplished something.

But if we just let things pile up on our list without ever finishing them or checking anything off, that’s when it becomes stressful.

A To-Do list is helpful only if you are using it to take action and get things done.

It’s a great way to control your stress so you don’t become overwhelmed and end up stuck.

Four Ways to De-stress Your Life

For me, there are four things I do so that stress doesn’t become overwhelming.

I truly believe that if you implement these four actions into your life, you will feel less stress.

These actions are simple, but they can make a huge difference in how stress affects you.

Rather than surrendering to your stress and becoming a hostage to it, you can learn to manage your stress much more effectively.

First, only stress about things you can control.

As I said before, this one practice can be a game-changer for your stress level.

The majority of your stress will be gone once you finish the things you can control.

Then do yourself a favor and let go of everything else.

Second, take some time for yourself each day.

Whatever it is you need for self-care—do it.

Self-care looks different for every single person.

It’s important to take at least 15 minutes a day to do something you love.

Read a book, watch TV that isn’t the news, talk with a friend, or do anything else that makes you feel good.

That is the key—do something that brings you joy. This is what self-care is all about.

Third, to put it simply, unplug.

We spend so much of our time on our computers and on our phones each day.

For a lot of us, our work involves being on our computers most of the day.

Then, when we aren’t working on our computers, we’re playing on our phones.

And scrolling through social media only makes the stress worse because it heightens our feelings of comparison and self-doubt.

If we want to lose the stress, we can start by unplugging for a bit. It really does make a difference.

Have a real face-to-face conversation with someone, and stop staring at your phone.

As my kids say to me when I’m aimlessly scrolling, “Stop being a screen-ager.”

Fourth, go outside.

This may sound like such a simple thing, but most of us don’t do it nearly enough.

There are amazing health benefits from going outside every day.

You will also experience a difference in the way you feel when you take some time to go outside and focus on nature.

Even just a few minutes outside can help to lower your stress.

Whether it’s a short walk or even just sitting on your patio, it will make a big difference.

The more we can learn to control our stress, the less overwhelmed we will feel each day.

Above all, it will give us the confidence we need to keep moving forward, even when life is hard.