Resilience is more than just a catchphrase. It’s a skill we all need in today’s ever-changing world.
We’ve all found ourselves in challenging situations. After all, we just lived through a pandemic which was a global challenge that we’re still recovering from.
Then there’s the war between Russia and Ukraine, the ridiculous gas prices, high inflation, racial bias, and on and on. We all need a heavy dose of resilience to help us get through those hard challenges life is continually throwing at us.
As I’ve watched how people weather the storms, I’ve discovered that resilient people move through challenges differently than others.
Why? Because they’ve learned skills that have enabled them to somehow make the best of a tough situation. How they think, the words they say, and what they do have helped them to be resilient in life’s storms.
If you need help weathering your own storms, here are five habits for greater resilience.
Resilient people practice acceptance.
Resilience is more than just a positive attitude and seeing the happy side of life. While these things certainly help, life isn’t always sunshine and roses.
Resilient people recognize that difficulties and challenges are an inevitable part of life. There is going to be sadness. There is going to be pain. And there are going to be things that we cannot change.
Pushing against these challenges when they come will only make them harder.
When we accept that these things are a natural part of life, we are more able to manage life’s challenges when they come.
It’s also helpful to recognize that our greatest growth comes in life’s difficulties. Recognizing these opportunities for growth and accepting them when they come will help us to stay focused on the positive side of every storm.
As we face our challenges head-on and accept them as growth opportunities, we will absolutely strengthen our resilience.
Resilient People live in the present.
Living in the present means that you remain focused on what you can do today.
Resilient people don’t let the past define them, and they don’t fear the future. They sit firmly in the present and do those things they can do while in the present.
This means that they don’t worry about the things they can’t control. And they are okay with not having all the answers.
They know that as long as they move forward in the present, things will eventually work out.
Living in the present is about not letting the things out of our control consume us and drive us to additional worry and stress.
Just do the things you can do today and let the worries of tomorrow come tomorrow.
The more we learn to live in the present, the greater our resilience will be.
Resilient people treasure connection.
Moving through challenges is much easier when you have trusted people to move through those trials with you.
Connection with others not only provides support but also brings a different perspective. This is especially true when it’s difficult to see beyond your own experience.
As you counsel with people you trust, you are creating a space where you can talk through your challenges. This will help you to get real answers to your questions and counsel and advice from a trusted friend.
Connecting with others can improve your mood and help to de-stress your life.
Resilient people often surround themselves with happy people. When you surround yourself with happy people, chances are that you’ll be happy too.
Connection is a powerful way to achieve greater resilience.
Resilient people practice regular self-care.
I have said this before, but I just feel that it can’t be said enough.
Self-care is not selfish.
Resilient people know that self-care is essential to maintaining their resilience. Without regular self-care, you cannot maintain a positive way of being.
It’s important to give yourself permission to do those things that make you happy. Go for a walk, spend quality time with family, take a vacation, or go to lunch with a friend.
Whatever it is that makes you happy, do it regularly. If you don’t know what makes you happy, figure it out. Find a hobby, learn a skill, or study a new language.
There are so many things out there that you can do to take time for yourself. If you want greater resilience in your life, make time for the pleasurable things in life.
Self-care is absolutely vital to moving through life’s storms in a healthy and positive way.
Resilient people utilize positive self-talk.
There are so many different ways to use positive self-talk. The two I use the most are affirmations and gratitude. These are the easiest to implement into my busy life.
I use affirmations in the morning while I’m standing in front of my mirror. They help me to remember who I am and how I want to show up in the world.
Gratitude I use at night in my gratitude moments. I review my day and acknowledge what I’m grateful for. You can even use a gratitude journal.
Another way to use positive self-talk is to change the story you are telling yourself. Stop telling yourself you can’t and instead identify what you can do.
Too often, we allow our beliefs about ourselves and our negative self-talk to overpower the positive self-talk we need to keep us resilient.
Get rid of those negative beliefs and the negative self-talk. It’s not helpful and will only keep you stuck.
As we learn to talk to ourselves in a more positive way, we will gain more confidence and a greater measure of resilience.
Choose your focus for greater resilience.
Resilience is about taking your focus off of what’s going wrong and focusing on what’s going right instead.
It’s about choosing to see the good in those tough situations rather than letting all the hard things drive your emotions and your choices.
Being resilient doesn’t mean that you see the world with rose-colored glasses. Of course, you see things as they are. But it’s about where you place your focus.
Just like looking through a camera, do you focus your lens on the storm clouds, or do you see the rainbow in the rain?
The more we keep our focus on the things that matter most, the more resilient we will be.
