Why I Wrote REAL Confidence (and What I Hope It Gives You)

For a long time, I thought I was the only one.

The only one who second-guessed her choices. The only one who replayed conversations in her head at night, wondering if she said the wrong thing. The only one who looked around at other women and thought, They’ve figured it out. They belong here. I’m trying to keep up.

It wasn’t until I started opening up in conversations that I realized how wrong I was. Woman after woman admitted she struggled too. Behind the polished surface, there were doubts, comparisons, and quiet questions of, Am I enough?

That was the spark for my new book, REAL Confidence: A Simple Guide to Go From Unsure to Unshakeable, which comes out February 3, 2026.

I wanted to write a book that would tell women the thing I wish someone had told me years ago: confidence isn’t something you either have or don’t have. It’s a skill you can build. It’s not reserved for certain people with shiny résumés or flawless lives. It’s something every single one of us can practice. And the best part? You can start today.

Confidence Isn’t a Finish Line

Writing this book forced me to reflect on my own story in ways I hadn’t before.

For years, I carried this nagging belief that I wasn’t enough. I was doing all the things, raising a family, working hard, showing up, but deep down, I was convinced that other people were more capable, more confident, more deserving.

As a mom who gave birth to three children, I thought I knew what it meant to handle motherhood. But then came Noah, my first adoption. And that experience changed everything.

Bringing Noah home taught me something I’ll never forget: we never stop learning. I thought I had the “mom thing” figured out, but life has a way of humbling us and reminding us that growth doesn’t end. Confidence works the same way. It’s not a finish line you cross once and for all. It’s a practice you keep building, day after day.

That lesson, one that came from my family, not a classroom or a boardroom, became a foundation for REAL Confidence.

Why This Book Took Longer Than Planned

I’ll be honest: this book took me longer to write than I expected.

Life kept happening. My family needed me. Work needed me. The world kept shifting. And I’ll admit, there were times when I wondered if the timing was all wrong.

We’re living in an age where uncertainty is the new normal. People are asking big questions: Will my job still exist next year? Is AI (no offense, ChatGPT) going to replace me? Am I keeping up with the pace of change? And beyond the workplace, there are questions of identity and belonging: Do I measure up? Am I doing enough? Am I enough?

Through all of that, I kept circling back to the same realization: you don’t need to change who you are, you need to change the way you see yourself.

That’s the heartbeat of REAL Confidence.

Being Real, Not Perfect

One of the reasons I named the book REAL Confidence is because I don’t believe in fake it till you make it. Pretending might get you through a meeting or a presentation, but it doesn’t build lasting confidence. It leaves you exhausted, worried that someone will see through the act.

What does build confidence is being real. Facing yourself in the mirror, seeing not only the flaws but the strength too, and deciding to respect what you see. Real confidence isn’t about being perfect. It’s about showing up as you are, with all the lessons and failures and messy middle moments that make you human.

And yes, that means failing sometimes. I’ve learned to see failure not as proof I’m not enough, but as information. Failure shows what didn’t work, it doesn’t define your worth.

That’s the kind of shift I want women to experience when they read this book.

Actionable Steps You Can Take Today

The other thing I knew was important from the very beginning was this: I didn’t want to write a book that inspired people for a moment and then collected dust on a nightstand.

I wanted REAL Confidence to be practical.

Every chapter includes exercises and tools you can use right away. From my “Ctrl-Alt-Delete” mindset reset to the “Drop the Word ‘Just’” exercise that helps you own your impact without minimizing it, the book is filled with steps that help you move from unsure to unshakeable, not in theory but in practice.

Because the truth is, confidence isn’t built by reading about it. It’s built by doing it. By taking small actions every single day that rewire the way you see yourself.

What I Hope You’ll Take Away

If I could sit across the table from every woman who reads this book, I’d tell her this:

  • You don’t have to perform confidence. You can practice it.
  • You don’t need to change who you are. You need to change how you see yourself.
  • You don’t need to do it all at once. You can start with one small step today.

More than anything, I want women to finish REAL Confidence believing that confidence is possible for them. Not someday. Not after they achieve something new. But today. Right where they are.

Why Now

The timing of this book matters.

The world is in a season of transition. Work is shifting. Families are shifting. Technology is shifting. And with so much change, it’s easy to feel unsteady. But this is also the perfect moment to reclaim something that doesn’t depend on outside circumstances: your confidence.

We can’t control everything around us. But we can control how we see ourselves. And when you anchor into that, you can face uncertainty with a steadiness that no outside change can take away.

That’s what unshakeable confidence is all about.

The Heart of It All

At the end of the day, this book isn’t about me. It’s about you.

It’s about every woman who has ever whispered, I don’t even recognize myself anymore. It’s about every mom who has thought she should have it figured out by now but is still learning every day. It’s about every professional who looks confident on paper but feels like she’s barely holding it together inside.

My hope is that when you turn the last page of REAL Confidence, you’ll feel a little lighter, a little braver, and a lot more willing to see yourself differently.

Because you don’t need to be perfect. You need to be real. And that’s where unshakeable confidence begins.

Meet Simone Knego

Simone Knego is an international speaker, award-winning author and two-time TEDx Speaker. Her work has been featured on ABC, NBC, and CBS and in Entrepreneur Magazine and Yahoo News. Her literary contributions have been honored by the National Indie Excellence Award and the NYC Big Book Award. Simone has not only summited Mt. Kilimanjaro, but she is also the heart of a bustling household with six children, three dogs, and one husband of 31 years. As the creator of the REAL Method, Simone continues to inspire and impact teams, fostering growth, and promoting self-discovery. 

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